It's Almost Halloween

(Actual Panic! At The Disco Song)

Halloween is today (didn't realize I'm still up past 11:30pm).

I'll be going as a bit of Harley Quinn today for school, Sailor Jupiter for Nebkon Saturday, and I'll wear a pretty silver Chinese dress Sunday.

I'm excited because I'm seeing friends again as well as meeting new ones (like Dan).

Uhmmmm...

Me and Cory are something.... 

I don't know what we are right now. Kristin said we're comfortable best friends. I don't know. But I kind of like not knowing where we stand with each other. It makes me less anxious. 

I think I have some "relationship anxiety". I had the same issues with Slade and Camren. But I do want to be next to him.

Grayson got him to smoke e-cigs... I hate it... He said he doesn't smoke much and he's gotten better since he started (he used to carry it on his person now it stays in his car). I still don't like it. I'm trying to quit. Drinking I'm trying to keep minimal (except for maybe this weekend). I don't know.

I broke down pretty bad Tuesday night and only talked to Cory about it (or rather, the part where I was still anxious about g and not the whole "I miss sitting next to your stupid face and messing around").

Then I broke down again Thursday morning.

I went to sit next to Cory and talk to him and friends and g came over before I got a chance to even speak a word and I broke. I was still crying after first mod. I was finally able to talk to him during passing period. We were both late to class, but he said I was more important. 

I know I'm not that important... but... I don't know... I'm tired and I have to be ready for Nebkon this weekend. 

Night.

<3